Bits and Pieces by Don EskinsOuch! A Wife’s Brutally Honest Opinion

For many seniors, golf offers a great way to exercise, socialize and compete. After all, what could be better than spending an afternoon on a beautiful course with people you love and care about?

Obviously, the answer to that question is to play well, at least well enough that you don’t embarrass yourself.

Which brings to mind a round of golf I carded several months ago here in Springfield, Mo. So bad was it that I almost tossed my clubs in a dumpster on my way home. But, being a retired teacher, I realized that a new set of golf clubs wouldn’t fit very well in our budget at that time.

So, swallowing my pride, I drove on home.

As I walked into my house, visibly upset, there to greet me as always was my beautiful wife Pookie.

“Well, how was it today?” she inquired with a smile.

“Terrible. I don’t even know why I play this game anymore. I’ve been teeing up for over 60 years, and I seem to get worse every time I go out!” I exclaimed. “I don’t know what’s wrong with my game.”

And then my wife of 53 years, who at times could be brutally honest, shared with me her opinion about my game.

“Well, dear,” she said, “maybe you’re just not any good.”

Ouch!

Once again, she had no reservations about telling me exactly what she thought, whether I wanted to hear it or not.

But to be honest, more often than not, what she had to say was usually something I needed to hear.

I used to tell her that she reminded me of our good friend, John Tigert, with long hair. John, often misunderstood, can also be brutally honest as well.

Looking back now, as much as her opinion may have hurt, it took the tension out of the air and made us both laugh. However, as funny as it was, her opinion was the only thing that made any kind of sense about my game at all that day.

It’s been just over a year now since I lost her and, while coming home to an empty house following another round of bad golf will never quite be the same, it’s hard not to think about her assessment of my game without smiling.

After all, a rough round of golf isn’t quite so bad, if it can make you smile.

More Bob Hope One Liners

“Golf is my real profession. Entertainment is just a sideline. I tell jokes to pay my greens fees.”

“If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.”

“(Wife) Dolores says there are days when I’m closer to shooting my weight than my age.”

“Titleist has offered me a big contract not to play its balls.”

“I’ve been playing this game so long that my handicap is in Roman numerals.”

“If I’m on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him.”